Doing It Anyway
Do you make friends with fear and do the thing?
When was the last time you felt nervous or scared? Did you do the thing anyway?
It’s been six years since I moved here, to this archipelago of six-and-a-half thousand islands nestled between Finland and Sweden. I’ve been challenged in ways I never imagined. I’ve stretched, expanded, and done lots of things, despite the anxiety and fear.
As I contemplate all the challenges I’ve met along the way, it’s left me wondering, what is it in us that helps us ‘do it anyway’? What kind of thoughts and feelings, skills and abilities does a person have to possess to swallow the fear and do it?
Perhaps it’s making friends with the fear.
If we swallow it—just writing those words makes me think of the fear sitting in my belly—it’s there, inside us. An ‘other’ kind of seperate entity. I don’t want that kind of somatic attachment. But if I make friends with fear, it somehow seems a more satisfying way of moving forward—knowing it’s there, recognising it’s a way for myself to protect me, but also being okay with taking action, with doing the ‘thing’.
After our recent gig—the best one yet!—a woman who has been to nearly all our gigs, told me how she thought I’d grown as a performer and how lovely it was for her to have witnessed it. Before my first gig way back in 2018, there was a whole lot of anxious cleaning going on! I felt sick! I was scared of it all.
But I did it anyway.
And I’ve done it again and again. Each time has been different and I’ve relaxed into it.
It feels like it’s the same with my business. I’ve felt that familiar gnawing of anxiety at times. The doubt creeping in as I expand and shift my focus. Much of what I’m doing has come from a deep intuitive level. I’m asking questions of my body. I’m listening to my subconscious, to my dreams. I’m feeling and responding.
It’s not like I haven’t made mistakes along the way. Although I prefer to see these things as opportunities for growth and learning. I haven’t always trusted and listened to my intuition but when I do I’m always rewarded. So if I veer a little to one side or off the path, I lean into the discomfort—which is always, you know, uncomfortable—and remind myself of what’s important. What matters to me.
So when the little voice creeps in, I now kindly tell it to quieten down. Always kindly, because it’s there to protect me. I cradle it, gently, giving it space, enough to settle it down so the inner strength and conviction can re-group.
My darling son asked me today if I felt like I’d lived a long life. He’s grappling with his mortality as he says goodbye to his paternal grandfather. Death is on his mind.
My answer: Do the thing. Do all the things. The things that make life sparkle. Embrace the glimmers. Live a life rich with experiences. Travel. Love. Taste life through all the senses.
Perhaps he’s making friends with fear.
He’s certainly learning about himself and the world.
Because life is all about doing it anyway. Despite. In spite of. It’s letting go and making friends with fear all at the same time.
It’s sitting with the big and small feelings. Leaning into the discomfort. Making friends with fear. Asking your body questions. Listening to your dreams. Surrendering. And finding kindred spirits to share it all with.
So… go on…do it anyway.
Stay Courageous,
Lisa x
My friend, Ianthe (sounds like Beyoncé) Mauro, has some beautiful merch with great quotes—including “doing it anyway”. Check out her webpage and choose a tote or hoodie!
Do all the things!
I’m always impressed with anyone who can get up and sing in public. I would imagine fear of forgetting the lyrics is always there somewhere in the back of the mind.
A friend who’s been in local bands most of his adult life and is now in his 70s keeps a loose-leaf notebook opened to the lyrics. “You never know,” he says.
Two weeks ago at Farm Aid, Bob Dylan showed up as a surprise performer with Tom Petty’s old band, the Heartbreakers. At 82, he looks pretty weather-beaten these days and his voice is gruff, and in a couple places I thought maybe he muffed the lyrics a bit. But looking at his site, it doesn’t look like he’s performed those songs in years, so good on him, I suppose. And he’s playing the guitar too, which is a shock (he’s been at the piano for years).
The sound is better than the video here, presumably shot by someone in the audience, but the darkness at the start is the way he was presented, as a surprise. The 3 songs are all from 1965:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8TMSLBy8c9w